I am feeling bad because I haven’t felt like posting…

The real reason is that sometimes I just don’t feel like sharing what is on my mind.

I am constantly depressed, and I feel bad for being depressed because my life is actually so much better that lots of people…. out there somewhere.

I have a boyfriend/lover/husband that is just the best. He is always kind to me, and does not gets upset at my moods, yes, he know that I have moods, though most people think that I am Suzie fucking sunshine.

I work out, and my body is such that 75% of my friends envy me, yet the real reason I work out, is to help deal me with my depression (and of course I’m not happy with it).

I have no friends, and that is my fault, because I tend to be a solitary person anyway, and I get tired of the people I do know, always needing help or constantly complaining about their lives (and now I’m complaining about mine)

I get cruised all the time, which should not be a problem, but I get cruised by men who want to get married, not someone who just wants to have fun. And the other side of that weirdness, is that when I’m in the city by myself, and I’m getting cruised, I just want to go home.

Okay, enough of that for awhile… When I was a kid I used to get depressed, and go for long bike rides, stop someplace and have a good cry, then I would feel better, I think it is time to get back on my bike and go for a long ride.

thanks for listening

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